Absolutely without a doubt I will definitely, probably maybe actually write something here.

Until then though...

Here's some dad jokes.

My boss said “dress for the job you want, not for the job you have.” So I went in as Batman.
I went to the aquarium this weekend, but I didn’t stay long. There’s something fishy about that place.
What do you call a sheep who can sing and dance? Lady Ba Ba.
What do you call a French man wearing sandals? Philipe Fallop.
Why can't dinosaurs clap their hands? Because they're extinct.
I gave my handyman a to-do list, but he only did jobs 1, 3, and 5. Turns out he only does odd jobs.
Where do rainbows go when they've been bad? To prism, so they have time to reflect on what they've done.
Dogs can't operate MRI machines. But catscan.
Can a frog jump higher than a house? Of course, a house can't jump.
I once submitted 10 puns to a joke competition. I really thought with that many, one was sure to be a winner. Sadly, no pun in ten did.
Why did the old man fall down the well? He couldn’t see that well.
Dad: What is the difference between a piano, a tuna, and a pot of glue? 
Me: I don't know.
Dad: You can tuna piano but you can't piano a tuna. 
Me: What about the pot of glue? 
Dad: I knew you'd get stuck on that.
Two windmills were sitting on a hill. One asks the other, "Do you have a favorite song?" The other replies, "Well... all my life I have been a heavy metal fan."
The other day I bought a thesaurus, but when I got home and opened it, all the pages were blank. I have no word to describe how angry I am.
The owner of the tuxedo store kept hovering over me when i was browsing, so I asked him to leave me alone. He said, “Fine, suit yourself.”
I found a book called How to Solve 50% of Your Problems. So I bought 2.

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